It time to let go that job or company of yours!!!!

The biggest disappointments in our lives are often the result of misplaced expectations. This is especially true when it comes to our jobs, relationships and interactions with others. Many people believe holding on and hanging in there, infinitely, are signs of incredible strength. But there are times when it takes much more strength to know when to let go, and then to actually do it.

 Over the years it has come to stay in my heart that most employers out there are only interested in socking the best out of you while, they never border if you sleep, eat or have a good life for yourself. To me this kind of employers are called killer of destiny and the sooner you are out of such environment the better for you.

You will never achieve what you are capable of if you are too attached to the things you’re supposed to let go of. Sometimes this killer of destiny might be your direct boss and not really the company as a whole.
 When to let go

1)Your Boss actions don’t match his/her words. – Everybody deserves somebody who helps them look forward to tomorrow. If someone has the opposite effect on you, because they are consistently inconsistent and their actions don’t match up with their words, it’s time to let them go. It’s always better to be alone than to be in bad company. True friendship is a promise made in the heart – silent, unwritten, unbreakable by distance, and unchangeable by time. Don’t listen to what people say; watch what they do. Your true friends will slowly reveal themselves over time.

 “Whenever I've been stuck with a Boss or a company, it's always brought me solace to the return to back to who I really am. It's a nice way to get outside my own head; and it brings me back to one of the most important reasons I write at all: to bring some pleasure to readers, to make them think or feel that most bosses out there are not willing to add value to the employee rather they take advantages of the innocent heart of the employee.” - Oluwabamidele

2)You truly dislike your current situation, routine, job, etc. – It’s better to be a failure at something you love than to succeed at doing something you hate. Don’t let someone who gave up on their dreams talk you out of going after yours. The best thing you can do in life is follow your heart. Take risks. Don’t just make the safe and easy choices because you’re afraid of what might happen. If you do, nothing will ever happen. Chances must be taken, mistakes must be made, and lessons must be learned. It might be an uphill climb, but when you reach that mountaintop it will be worth every ounce of blood, sweat and tears you put into it.

 “Incredible change happens in your life when you decide to take control of what you do have power over instead of craving control over what you don't.”- Steve Maraboli

 3)Your boss expects you to be someone you’re not. – Don’t change who you are for anyone else. It’s wiser to lose someone over being who you are, than to keep them by being someone you’re not. Because it’s easier to mend a broken heart, than it is to piece together a shattered identity. It’s easier to fill an empty space in your life where someone else used to be, than it is to fill the empty space inside yourself where you used to be. You will never achieve what you are capable of if you’re too attached to things you’re supposed to let go of.

 4)You go all out to sacrifice your happiness and time. – If you allow people to make more withdrawals than deposits in your life, you will be out of balance and in the negative before you know it. Know when to close the account. It’s always better to be alone with dignity than working in a company that constantly requires you to sacrifice your happiness and self-respect. “There's a trick to the Graceful Exit. It begins with the vision to recognize when a job, a life stage, a relationship is over - and to let go. It means leaving what's over without denying its value.” - Ellen Goodman

Lastly, People rarely behave exactly the way you want them to, and the one thing you should never let go of is hope. Remember what you deserve and keep pushing forward. Hope for the best, but expect less, Someday all the pieces will come together. Unimaginably good things will transpire in your life, even if everything doesn't turn out exactly the way you had anticipated. And remember, the magnitude of your happiness will be directly proportional to your thoughts and how you choose to think about things. Even if a situation or relationship doesn't work out at all, it’s still worth it if it made you feel something new, and if it taught you something new.

Dealing With A Difficult Boss

Nothing can be more saddened in the work environment than working with a difficult boss. I have heard people saying this all over again how bad and rough working with a difficult boss. One can say that employee has a series of bosses over their working career. Hopefully, most of your bosses are competent, kind, and even, worthy of your trust and respect.

Sometime it is worth trying to understand the reason behind the behaviour of your boss. There might be a genuine reason for the misconduct, such as a grave personal problem that is spilling on to his professional life. If this is the case, the problem at best is temporary.
Well. A difficult boss is a universal phenomenon. All of us at one point in time or the other have faced the devil who called him/herself our boss that just loves twisting all what we do around and takes pleasure in trashing your hard day's work right into the bin without any compunction.

It has been noted that many hands-off manager may not realize that his failure to provide any direction or feedback makes him or her bad boss. She/he may think she/he’s empowering the staff. A manager who provides too much direction and micromanages may feel insecure and uncertain about his own job. He may not realize his direction is insulting to a competent, secure, self-directed staff member.

Or, maybe the boss lacks training and is so overwhelmed with his job requirements that he can’t provide support for you. Perhaps he has been promoted too quickly or his reporting responsibilities have expanded beyond his reach. In these days of downsizing, responsibilities are often shared by fewer staff members than ever before.


Take a time to talk to this boss. Tell him what you need from him/her in term of direction, feedback and support. Be polite and focus on your needs. Telling the boss she/he’s a bad boss is counterproductive and won’t help you meet your goals.

Most people are scared and find it difficult having a discussion with their boss concerning their abusive behavior because they fear reprimand or losing their job as a result of it. Well one can easily say that the fear is usually justified if the supervisor is a control-freak and feels that their subordinate is threatening their control.

Before you deal with any type of conflict, you always need to have an alternative plan should in case things don’t work out the way you plan. Having alternative plan is the best alternative that you can come up without having to negotiate anything with your boss.
In this type of scenario, your best alternative plan would probably take the form of having an actual job offer in hand with another employer before you have your talk. By not having a back-up plan, you have given your abusive boss even more leverage over you because they know you have nowhere else to go.

Having a good alternative plan however, empowers you with the ability to walk-away at any time should the negotiation not go right.

If you think the problem is that your boss can’t – or won’t – change, ask for a transfer to another department. This recommendation presumes you like your employer and your work.

Discuss rather than confront. When your boss criticizes you, don’t react out of emotion and become confrontational with them about it because that just breeds more conflict. Instead, use their criticism as a topic for discussion on interests, goals, and problem-solving and ask them for their advice. If they criticize your work, then that means that they have their own idea on how that work should be done, so ask them for their advice on how your work can be improved.

Don’t go to up the chain of command unless it’s a last resort. Going straight up the chain of command is not an effective way of dealing with a difficult supervisor because it only increases conflict in the workplace. Your immediate supervisor will consider this a very serious backstabbing maneuver and might seek some sort of retribution in the future against you and your career. Also, other people in your workplace might brand you as a whistleblower because of your actions. Try to discuss issues with your supervisor first and only go up the chain of command as a last resort.

Lastly if you just can't handle the stress anymore? Then go ahead and vent your woes about your unfortunate situation with your colleagues, friends, and family - well practically anyone who is willing to lend you a patient ear. During this will relieve you of tension and give you solace that you are not the only one afflicted with a bad sore-of a boss.

Sometimes, you just have to be a little diplomatic in your dealings with your boss. There are times when people in positions of power feel insecure due to their subordinates. In such situations, you have to make sure that you give colleagues and your boss credit for what you are able to accomplish.

Becoming an agent of change in your community

How does one become a better person in the community?

I can recall when I was studying for my under –graduate degree some years back, I didn’t like reading or anything that has to do with education. I find it hard coping with my assignments and other school stuffs

Now when I look back to my days in the university and who I am now, it reaffirmed to me that anyone out there can really make a different if he/she chooses to.

I remember one of my lecturers then, an associate professor called me to his office, we were together for over 1 hour discussing about my academic performance and attitude in class and the effect it will have on me if I choose not to change.

When I got back to my room that same evening, something came into my mind, and that is Don't get discouraged; it is often the last key in the bunch that opens the lock.
Immediately, I decided to work on becoming a better person. I didn’t like who I was becoming and I wanted to change that. After all, it’s quite miserable and frustrating graduating from university with a pass.

Days after, the word of the professor keep coming to my mind and that is ‘if I choose to change” then that means, I can be a better person but the option is mind to decide on. I started buying motivation books; spend more time on reading and doing my assignments, attending my lectures regularly.

Today, it a different story, I make it a point of duty to at least read something new on each day, I am a regular writer, I lectures and also trains the trainers. You too can be better than this, but the question is “Are you ready for a change” Now is the time.

“Freedom is the will to be responsible to ourselves” Friedrich Nietzsche

Below are some steps to becoming a better person.

Learn to take responsibility
Before anything else, you should realize that the one who is responsible for your life is you. Don’t blame other people or external condition for how you live your life. No matter how bad the situation might be, it’s you who decide how to respond to it. No matter what happens to you, it’s you who decide how it affects you.

“A sign of wisdom and maturity is when you come to terms with the realization that your decisions cause your rewards and consequences. You are responsible for your life, and your ultimate success depends on the choices you make.” Denis Waitley

Seek growth. Spend some of your time, resources, and talents to create systemic change that benefits all. Choose the issues that most concern and compel you, get involved, and relish the joy that such generosity brings to yourself and others, if I can make my career then you can.

Work on your negative traits. Are there any traits you dislike about yourself? Some traits which I didn’t like about myself in the past include being lazy, not willing to learn, playful etc. Identify them, and then work on them one at a time. It can be challenging to try to overhaul your character at one go. On the other hand, if you work on addressing one negative trait at a time, it’s a lot more manageable and achievable

Have a mentor. Having a mentor is a positive start for a change, it gives us a concrete image of who we want to become. I see mentor like a small god in one’s life. People like warren Buffett (for his zeal and passion to create and manage wealth. Jean Piaget's (work had a profound influence on psychology). William James. (Psychologist and philosopher is often referred to as the father of American psychology).Who is/are your role model(s), and what do you like about them?

Be a mentor yourself. The best way to be a better person is to be a mentor to others. How can you be an inspirational guide to others? Live by example. In being a mentor, remember it’s not about making yourself into someone you’re not It’s about living true to your ideal self

“Hold yourself responsible for a higher standard than anybody expects of you. Never excuse yourself.” Henry Ward Beecher

Appreciates what you do. Do what you love- If we can finally admit that we are in need of something to fill the void in our life that eats at us every moment. Do not think that loving a partner; even a distant friend will make you become suddenly happy. Satisfaction is only obtained through the knowledge of realization that only a true passion that will return to you its rewards, and then will satisfy your void and human thirst for fulfillment. Love something, that will give back and that you will not have expectations for! Be in control.

“Make the best use of what is in your power, and take the rest as it happens.” Epictetus

Willingness to learn. Ask your friends and colleagues about what they are involved in that they may never have told you about before. If an issue sparks your interest, join them in their efforts.

Step out of your comfort zone. Are you sticking to the same routines and hiding behind a safety net? Step out and do something you’ve never done before. It’ll broaden your mind and make you a better person, take a new challenge in life. For life is full of change.

Be Yourself. Be bold in whatever you have decided to do. Life is an adventure, don’t live in fear. With boldness you can achieve your dreams. Be bold will position you to the life you ever wanted for yourself

“Disciplining yourself to do what you know is right and important, although difficult, is the high road to pride, self-esteem and personal satisfaction.” Brian Tracy

Having a committed sprit. To your goals and dreams. If you’ve set a goal, go all out and achieve it. If you’ve laid down a plan, stick to it all through the way. Don’t waver, for that’s not in you to do so.

“Happiness is being the creator of your experience, choosing to take pleasure in what you have, right now, regardless of the circumstances, while being the best you that you can be.” Alex Shalman

Be Compassionate & Kind. Always look out for opportunities where you can help others. Don’t get caught up in your own space – instead, look outwards and see if there’s anything you can do for others. Even the simplest things, like helping someone carry his/her belongings, is very much appreciated by others.

Spend time with your love ones and family. It is truly a learning experience to all of us. Spending quality time away from the T.V. can help you delve into the minds and hearts of your loved ones, allowing you to help them with any problems they may be experiencing and getting to genuinely know them.

Stay active. Being healthy and fit allows you to perform more tasks with ease and precision. Spend few minutes on activity a day can help you lead a healthier, longer, more fruitful life. Eat good and healthy food. If you haven’t been doing that, start now and you'd be amazed at how much body and mind are connected.

Be Caring. Showing some love and concern to your friends, There’s no need to wait for a cry for help before showing your care and concern. You can do it right away, right now, to those around you. Even if there’s nothing wrong, it’ll warm the hearts of others to know that you cared. Make it a point of duty to always call friends; Do you have list of friends and relatives you’ve not contacted for a while? Why can’t you start calling them today and check on how they’re doing. They may not show it, but they’ll be happy that you called – because it showed you cared.

Be Attentive to others. When someone is talking, give him/her your full attention. Don’t busy yourself with something else that does not relate to the discussion at that point.

Have quality input. Your input determines your output. That’s why you need to feed your mind with positive and uplifting thoughts every day. Listen to motivational audio and video programs. Read inspiring books. Read quotes by great people.

Lastly
Focus your mind on something positive- High motives and noble thoughts can be transferred into actions where we become aware of healing and helping all people because we are all brothers and sisters and deserve love no matter what the past or present or future.

Making your New Year resolution work for you

What is New Year resolution?

A New Year's resolution is a commitment that an individual makes to a project or the reforming of a habit, often a lifestyle change that is generally interpreted as advantageous. The name comes from the fact that these commitments normally go into effect on New Year's Day
The tradition of the New Year's Resolutions goes all the way back to 153 B.C. Janus, a mythical king of early Rome was placed at the head of the calendar.

With two faces, Janus could look back on past events and forward to the future. Janus became the ancient symbol for resolutions and many Romans looked for forgiveness from their enemies and also exchanged gifts before the beginning of each year.
Making a resolution has become a part of life of many people. Today everyone make a resolution at the beginning of the year but keeping such resolution could face a lot of challenges.

Below are some tips to keep your resolution.

Whether or not you keep your resolution all depends on what your resolution is. You don't need to aim low, but the rules of time, space and physical reality should come into play. Don't expect to scale Everest by May if you haven't been off the couch in a decade.

Make a resolution
It will be more better an easier if we make One resolution at a time, with this you will have the time to focus on it and work closely to achieve it

Have a say on your resolution
When making a resolution put yourself into consideration, Do not make the mistake of allowing our family to decide on our resolution. You know what you want.

Be realistic
The surest way to fall short of your goal is to make your goal unattainable. For instance, resolving to never eat your favorite food again because it bothers your IBD could be a bad choice. Strive for a goal that is attainable, such as avoiding it more often than you do now.

Plan ahead
Don't make your resolution on New Year's Eve. If you wait until the last minute, it will be based on your mindset that particular day. Instead, it should be planned well before December 31 arrives.

Outline your plan
Find alternatives to a behavior that you want to change, and make this part of your resolution plan. So you want to quit smoking but you smoked to relax yourself? What other forms of relaxation are available to you?

The next step is to group this resolution to a time frame. It’s time to make a plan. Having a detailed road map is the key to making a resolution.

Set Short-Term Goals
You've got to break down your larger goal into smaller, achievable goals with measurable results. This is the best way to keep yourself motivated and on target. Give yourself check-in dates on the calendar, and reward yourself when you reach your subgoals. If your New Year's resolution involves a weight loss plan or fitness regimen, ask your doctor for help in creating your personal road map.

Plan for the Obstacles
What might cause you to veer from your plan? Work-related stress? Family tensions? When something does happen, be ready for it. Think about what's most likely to trip your plan up. Try to avoid those situations or brainstorm healthy ways to cope with them.

Talk about it
Don't keep your resolution a secret. Tell friends and family members who will be there to support your resolve to change yourself for the better or improve your health. The best case scenario is to find yourself a buddy who shares your New Year's resolution and motivate each other.

Reward yourself
This doesn't mean that you can eat an entire box of chocolates if your resolution is to diet. Instead, celebrate your success by treating yourself to something that you enjoy that does not contradict your resolution. If you've been sticking to your promise to eat better, for example, perhaps your reward could be going to a movie with a friend.

Track your progress
Keep track of each small success you make toward reaching your larger goal. Short-term goals are easier to keep, and small accomplishments will help keep you motivated. Instead of focusing on losing 30 pounds, say, focus on losing that first 5. Keeping a food diary or a symptom journal may help you stay on track.

Don't beat yourself up
Obsessing over the occasional slip won't help you achieve your goal. Do the best you can each day, and take each day one at a time.

Stick to it
Experts say it takes about 21 days for a new activity, such as exercising, to become a habit, and 6 months for it to become part of your personality. Your new healthful habits will become second-nature in no time.

Remain Flexible

Expect that your plan can and will change. Life has a funny way of throwing unexpected things at us, and flexibility is required to complete anything but the simplest goal. Sometimes the goal itself will even change. Most of all, recognize partial successes at every step along the way. Just as a resolution isn't accomplished the day it's stated, neither is it accomplished the day you reach your goal. Rather, it's accomplished in many small increments along the way. Acknowledge these incremental successes as they come.

Keep trying
If your resolution has totally run out of steam by mid-February, don't despair. Start over again!




It never too late to make a resolution, you can decide to make one now.


Quotes on New Year Resolutions

The object of a New Year is not that we should have a new year. It is that we should have a new soul.
G. K. Chesterton

Be always at war with your vices, at peace with your neighbors, and let each new year find you a better man.
Benjamin Franklin

Year's end is neither an end nor a beginning but a going on, with all the wisdom that experience can instill in us.
Hal Borland

The Old Year has gone. Let the dead past bury its own dead. The New Year has taken possession of the clock of time. All hail the duties and possibilities of the coming twelve months!
Edward Payson Powell

Cheers to a New Year and another chance for us to get it right.
Oprah Winfrey

What is your dream in the coming year? Work on your dream now

Dreams are valuable commodities. They propel position us for the future. They give us energy. They make us enthusiastic. Everyone ought to have a dream. But what if you’re not sure whether you have a dream you want to pursue? Sometimes not all dreams that can be achieved. Let’s face it. Dreams can be positive or negative. Others have dreams but lose hope and set them aside

To achieve the future you want, you must identify what you really want to do and then work on your dream. Don't just daydream about what you want, identify it, plan how to achieve it, and then act on your dream. That is the path to the success you want.


Some people know just exactly what they want to do when they grow up and it doesn't change. Others of us are much more mercurial and scatter our efforts in many directions as things catch our attention. Sure, it's fun and there are a lot of great experiences that we can live as a result of going off in so many directions.


•Your Instinct
When we talk about dreams then we also take a look at instinct, you must be able to trust your instinct at all time. Don’t expect to be able to work out what your dream is overnight but you’ll get there. In fact, you probably know what your dream is already; you just need to get back in touch with your natural instincts on this one. That’s right, now’s the time to trust your instincts, an old and vital skill that some of us have lost touch with. So why don’t they work anymore? Because other people have confused us and told us not to trust them. As a child, did your parents, teachers or friends ever ask you if you were sure about a decision and cause you to doubt it? If that happened a lot your instinctive knowledge may have got scrambled.

•Believe in yourself.
Napoleon Hill once said in his book, Think and grow rich and I quote “Whatever the mind can conceive and believe, it can achieve”
As for me whatever I believe I can achieve whatever I set my mind on sometime when I tell people around me about my dreams in life, they look at me as if I don’t know what am saying, but the truth is that yes I know what am saying, and I know everyone out there can equally do the same so why denied yourself the opportunity.

As soon as you start telling others about your new direction in life and what you're going to do to accomplish it, they'll start trying to hold you back. Perhaps it's just human nature. Perhaps they feel insecure and don't want you to change and leave them behind. Perhaps they're trying to save you from possible disappointment.
Whatever the reasons, they'll start saying things that can steal your dream. They are known as dreams killer. They will start saying a lot of negative things about your dreams, giving you excuses why the dream will cannot work. They'll tell you a thousand varied ways you can fail and as many reasons why you shouldn't even try
Focus on your dream and work towards achieving it. You must believe in yourself that you've identified something that is important to you and that is worth the effort you'll have to expend to make it real.

•Sometimes past experiences hinder dreams
Disappointment is the gap that exists between expectation and reality. We have all at one point in time experience disappointment in one form or the other. When something goes wrong, we say, “I’ll never do that again!” What a mistake, especially when it comes to our dreams! Failure is the price we must pay to achieve success.


•Lack the Confidence
When we talk about dreams then we also take recognition of the word confidence. It usually takes more courage and efforts to bring your dreams to reality and with this you must process confidence in whatever you are doing.
It takes confidence to talk about a dream and even more to pursue it. And sometimes confidence separates the people who dream and pursue those dreams from those who don’t.

Put Your Dream to the Test

John C. Maxwell pointed out 10 questions that can help you see and seize your dreams, below are his questions.
What’s the difference between a dreamer and someone who achieves a dream? According to best-selling author Dr. John Maxwell, the answer lies in answering ten powerful, yet straightforward, questions. Whether you’ve lost sight of an old dream or you are searching for a new one within you, Put Your Dream to the Test provides a step-by-step action plan that you can start using today to see, own, and reach your dream. Dr. Maxwell draws on his forty years of mentoring experience to expertly guide you through the ten questions required of every successful dreamer:
•The Ownership Question: Is my dream really my dream?
•The Clarity Question: Do I clearly see my dream?
•The Reality Question: Am I depending on factors within my control to achieve my dream?
•The Passion Question: Does my dream compel me to follow it?
•The Pathway Question: Do I have a strategy to reach my dream?
•The People Question: Have I included the people I need to realize my dream?
•The Cost Question: Am I willing to pay the price for my dream?
•The Tenacity Question: Am I moving closer to my dream?
•The Fulfillment Question: Does working toward my dream bring satisfaction?
•The Significance Question: Does my dream benefit others?

The point here is that if really explore each question, examine yourself honestly and answer yes to all of them, the odds of your achieving your dream are very good. I truly believe that everyone has the potential to imagine a worthwhile dream, and most have the ability to achieve it. And it doesn’t matter how big or how seemingly outrageous your dream appears to others if your answers are yes to the Dream Test questions.


Quote on Dreams


Wilma Rudolph
“Never underestimate the power of dreams and the influence of the human spirit. We are all the same in this notion: The potential for greatness lives within each of us.”

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe: Dreams Quotes
Dream no small dreams for they have no power to move the hearts of men.

H. F. Hedge: Dreams Quotes
Dreaming is an act of pure imagination, attesting in all men a creative power, which, if it were available in waking, would make every man a Dante or a Shakespeare.

Marsha Norman: Dreams Quotes
Dreams are illustrations from the book your soul is writing about you.

Dale E. Turner: Dreams Quotes
Dreams are renewable. No matter what our age or condition, there are still untapped possibilities within us and new beauty waiting to be born

James Allen: Dreams Quotes
Dream lofty dreams, and as you dream, so shall you become.
Wishing you all a wonderful season, see you next year

Eradicating Negative Thinking

I could remember some months ago I deal with creating a positive thinking, but let think of it we are all human begin that mean at a point in our lives we do have negative thoughts. Today I will be dealing more on handling a negative thought even when they appears in our mind.
Time as shows that a mind filled with negative thoughts makes you feel miserable, inadequate and will lead you to failure after failure no matter how hard you try to succeed.

If you want to succeed, enjoy happiness and live a life of abundance, and prosperity then you have to eliminate any consistent negative thinking, and negative beliefs.
You also have to replace those negative thoughts with positive thoughts that allow you to succeed and enjoy life.
We should note that negative thoughts and beliefs develop over time, they come from our friends, our family, fellow co-workers, advisers, teachers, even strangers - and they come from Us.

We often create most of the negative thoughts that we have and it's only because we haven't trained our mind to be positive and we haven't created positive beliefs that allow us to succeed.

Let take a look at some of the many ways to eradicate negative thinking

The first step in stopping negative thinking is to become aware that you are thinking negative. That may sound silly, but once you start to become conscious of it, you’ll be surprised. Remember that a pain event is anything you don’t like. So start to become aware or conscious of things you don’t like. Notice when you first begin feeling angry, frustrated, sad, and stressed or any negative feeling. That’s the first step. Train yourself to become conscious.

Surround yourself with positive people. Have you ever heard the saying, "birds of a feather flock together"? It is the same with both positive and negative people. If your current friends do nothing but tear others down, complain, and generally be negative, it is going to be very difficult for you to get over being negative in that environment. You may, very well, need to make some new friends. Have people of great minds around you, associates with them.

One other reason that negative thoughts become so automatic and pervasive in our minds is that they are consistent with our typical feelings. If you find yourself jumping to negative conclusions about yourself, your abilities, and your options and opportunities, it’s probably because that feels “right” and comfortable to you.

This doesn't mean you have to figure out why it feels "right" to feel bad about yourself. Again, you'll simply respond better to doing things differently, rather than spending hours rooting through emotional baggage. Changing those negative thoughts and judgments into realistic and reasonable ones is going to feel uncomfortable and unnatural. In fact, feeling uncomfortable is probably a good sign that this is exactly what you need to be doing to get past your problems.
When you find yourself arriving at a negative conclusion about you or your situation, stop thinking that and start thinking the exact opposite. If you’re thinking that there’s something fundamentally wrong with you, tell yourself the problem is finding the situation to the problem.

Prayers and reading God’s word will help to turn your negative thoughts around, focuses on God gives you an assurance that there is a way out of every situation. Take some time out to listen to motivation talks, buy CD’s read books that touches live positively.

The moment you hear in your mind chatter that says you can not do a task, a negative thought about your personality or that your subconscious wants you to not believe in yourself, say "CANCEL". Do this consistently and out loud. Scream it or stop if you have to. It may seem a bit comical, but believe me it will work.

On the last note; Continue nurturing your mind by working with affirmations and other positive techniques, think positively at all times, this will keep the thought of negative thinking out of your mind and help you move in a new and a positive direction of life.


Quotes on Negative thinking

“If you realized how powerful your thoughts are, you would never think a negative thought.” Peace Pilgrim

“There is little difference in people, but that little difference makes a big difference. The little difference is attitude. The big difference is whether it is positive or negative.” W. Clement Stone

“Fear is a habit; so is self-pity, defeat, anxiety, despair, hopelessness and resignation. You can eliminate all of these negative habits with two simple resolves: I can!! And I will!!”

“Never cut a tree down in the wintertime. Never make a negative decision in the low time. Never make your most important decisions when you are in your worst moods. Wait. Be patient. The storm will pass. The spring will come.” Robert H. Schuller


“Adopting the right attitude can convert a negative stress into a positive one”
Hans Selye

“Positive thinking will let you do everything better than negative thinking will.”
Zig Ziglar

“It takes but one positive thought when given a chance to survive and thrive to overpower an entire army of negative thoughts.”
Robert H. Schuller

“Basically we are all the same human beings with the same potential to be a good human being or a bad human being ... The important thing is to realize the positive side and try to increase that; realize the negative side and try to reduce. That's the way.” Dalai Lama

Controlling your Anxiety by Putting you mind to work

What is Anxiety: - is a state of uneasiness and apprehension, as about future uncertainties.
Anxiety affects our whole being. It affects how we feel, how we behave and has very real physical symptoms.

It feels a bit like fear but whereas we know what we are frightened of, we often don't know what we are anxious about.

What causes anxiety?
Anxiety is often triggered by stress in our lives. Some of us are more vulnerable to anxiety than others, but even those who become anxious easily can learn to manage it well. We can also make ourselves anxious with "negative self-talk" - a habit of always telling ourselves the worst will happen.

If there is nothing that you can do to resolve the issue that is causing your anxiety - the situation is completely out of your control - realize one thing. The only thing that you have absolute control over is yourself. If there is nothing that you can do about a situation, simply stop worrying about it. Acknowledge the situation, acknowledge the stress and anxiety that it is causing you, and finally, acknowledge the fact that it is out of your control, and whatever the result of the situation is, that is the result that you will have to live with. Since the only thing that you truly control is yourself, determine how you want to live your life, and how you want to feel, and then make it happen.

Earle Nightingale compares our minds to the world’s most powerful computer. Most scientists agree that we only use a fraction of our mind’s potential. Nightingale says that when we ask ourselves a disempowering question, our mind searches for a corresponding disempowering answer.
So if you ask yourself why you can’t achieve this or that, your mind may just come up with an answer like this: “Well, what do you expect? You never put in your best.” If you ask why you can’t stick to exercising more time for the success, your mind may answer: “Don’t worry about it— “is not everyone that will be successful”

If there is no apparent cause, and you have Generalized Anxiety Disorder, is there anything in the world today that you have the control to do anything about? Only think about today - right now. Don't allow your mind to wander to tomorrow and all of the 'what if's.' Concentrate on living more in the moment and less in the future - and simply deal with the things that you are able to deal with today, right now.

How can you stop creating what you don't want and get your mind and subconscious mind to actually work for you?

You probably don't regularly choose your thoughts, or instruct your subconscious mind. Instead, your mind and subconscious mind are probably working on autopilot - just doing what they want when they want with no clear instructions.

You're probably not even aware of the thoughts you have every day, and you probably didn't choose the beliefs you hold. As a result your mind is constantly sending the wrong messages or wrong instructions to your subconscious mind. And that's how you end up failing or not getting what you want.

If you want to succeed at something you have to believe that you can succeed. So how do you create beliefs that correspond with what you want to accomplish?
First think about what you want to achieve. Then ask yourself if you really believe that you can accomplish this particular goal. If you don't believe you can there's work to do and you're going to have to change your belief system so that it allows you to succeed. To change your belief system you have to analyze your thoughts and list all the thoughts and beliefs that you have about achieving that goal.

If you are an 'anxiety lifer' you may have to ask yourself these questions every single day, and possibly more than once a day to keep yourself on track and to keep the anxiety at bay, but taking the time to do this is always well worth the effort. The mind is very powerful, and just as your mind can cause you to see everything in a negative light, you can make a concentrated effort to see the more positive side of life as well, for the purpose of combating anxiety.

Quotes on Anxiety
“Worry is a thin stream of fear trickling through the mind. If encouraged, it cuts a channel into which all other thoughts are drained.”
Somers Roche

“Anxiety is the rust of life, destroying its brightness and weakening its power. A childlike and abiding trust in Providence is its best preventive and remedy.”

“Anxiety about the future never profits; we feel no evil until it comes, and when we feel it, no counsel helps; wisdom is either too early or too late.”
Somers Roche

“We walk in circles, so limited by our own anxieties that we can no longer distinguish between true and false, between the gangster's whim and the purest ideal”
Ingrid Bergman

“The source of anxiety lies in the future. If you can keep the future out of mind, you can forget your worries.”
Milan Kundera

Putting your imagination to work

Imagination is the ability to confront and deal with reality by using the creative power of the mind; resourcefulness, or the formation of a mental image of something that is neither perceived as real nor present to the senses. It is the ability of the mind to build mental scenes, objects or events that do not exist, are not present or have happened in the past. Memory is actually a manifestation of imagination. Everyone possesses some imagination ability. In some it may be highly developed and in others it may manifest in a weaker form. It manifests in various degrees in various people.

The real key in putting our imagination into reality is acting as if the imagined scene were real and already accomplished. Instead of pretending it is a scene from the future, imagine it as though you are truly experiencing it in the present. It is a real event in the now. The great masters of antiquity have told us through the ages that whatever you believe you become. If you believe and imagine in the now that you are whatever you wish to be then reality must conform.
The problem most of us have is that we look at our lives through eyes of lack, seeing only what we don’t have and dwell on that. That is also active imagination. You are imagining and actively pushing this lack into your future by dwelling on it as real in the now.

Imagination makes it possible to experience a whole world inside the mind. It gives the ability to look at any situation from a different point of view, and enables one to mentally explore the past and the future.

It manifests in various forms, one of which is daydreaming. Though too much idle daydreaming may make one impractical, some daydreaming, when not being engaged in something that requires attention provides some temporary happiness, calmness and relief from stress.
In your imagination you can travel anywhere in the speed of light without any obstacles. It can make you feel free, though temporarily, and only in the mind, from tasks, difficulties and unpleasant circumstances.

Imagination is not limited only to seeing pictures in the mind. It includes all the five senses and the feelings. One can imagine a sound, taste, smell, a physical sensation or a feeling or emotion. For some people it is easier to see mental pictures, others find it easier to imagine a feeling, and some are more comfortable imagining the sensation of one of the five senses. Training of the imagination gives the ability to combine all the senses. You have the power to do anything you want if you first imagine it in your mind’s eye.

Arnold Schwarzenegger, five time Mr. Universe, four-time Mr. Olympia, He once said about his training and I quote “ As long as the mind can envision the fact that you can do something, you can....I visualized myself being there already - having achieved the goal already. It’s mind over matter.”
If you do not recognize how importance it is to put your imagination to work, and let it run riot, your life may not be as happy and successful as you would have wanted it to be.

Lack of understanding of the important of imagination is responsible for the suffering, incompetence, difficulties, failures and unhappiness people experience. For some reason, most people are inclined to think in a negative way. They do not expect success. They expect the worst, and when they fail, they believe that fate is against them. This attitude can be changed, and then life will improve accordingly.

This power cannot be underestimated. You can prove it to yourself by taking one thing that is very important to you and imagining it as real in your life. You have nothing to lose by applying this technique, and everything to gain. Your creative abilities will blossom and flourish the more you apply it to your life. Don’t take anyone else’s word for it, and play with the concept until it works for you.

As you charge your imagination with emotion, your mental picture will attract its physical equivalent. Vividly think about what you want and then SEE it clearly in your imagination. Putting your imagination to work speeds up the process from desire to manifestation. As you experience in your imagination what you wish to experience in your life, you will soon be living the life of your dreams.


NOTE
•When put our imagination to work, we can heal the Earth.

•When put our imagination to work, we can build a just society

•When put our imagination to work, we can enlighten the human spirit

•When put our imagination to work, we can help nature to thrive

•When put our imagination to work, we can create the invisible

•When put our imagination to work, we can create peace on Earth, live happily among one another.

•When put our imagination to work, we can gather knowledge, enlightening our souls to the reality of existence and the beauty of the Earth.


Quotes on Imagination
I believe in the imagination. What I cannot see is infinitely more important than what I can see. Duane Michals

I doubt that the imagination can be suppressed. If you truly eradicated it in a child, he would grow up to be an eggplant. Ursula K. Le Guin

All men who have achieved great things have been great dreamers. Orison Swett Marden

Everything that is new or uncommon raises a pleasure in the imagination, because it fills the soul with an agreeable surprise, gratifies its curiosity, and gives it an idea of which it was not before possessed. Joseph Addison

There is a boundary to men's passions when they act from feelings; but none when they are under the influence of imagination. Edmund Burke

Those who dream by day are cognizant of many things that escape those who dream only at night. Edgar Allan Poe

Limitations live only in our minds. But if we use our imaginations, our possibilities become limitless. Jamie Paolinetti

If my mind can conceive it, and my heart can believe it, I know I can achieve it. Jesse Jackson quotes

I can believe anything provided it is incredible. Oscar Wilde

Logic will get you from A to B. Imagination will take you everywhere. Albert Einstein

Imagination is more important than knowledge. For knowledge is limited to all we now know and understand, while imagination embraces the entire world, and all there ever will be to know and understand. Albert Einstein

Overcoming fear

Fear is the most dominant and persistent emotion we ever experience. it rules our minds and hearts and determines the quality of our lives, our success, the nature of our thinking and how we deal with the various problems in our lives. There is no exaggeration in saying that most of the emotions we experience are but different versions of the same fear.

Definitions of fear -:
•Be afraid or feel anxious or apprehensive about a possible or probable situation or event; "I fear she might get aggressive"
•Be afraid or scared of; be frightened of; "I fear the winters in Moscow"; "We should not fear the Communists!"
•An emotion experienced in anticipation of some specific pain or danger (usually accompanied by a desire to flee or fight)
•Be uneasy or apprehensive about; "I fear the results of the final exams"
•concern: an anxious feeling; "care had aged him"; "they hushed it up out of fear of public reaction"
•Reverence: regard with feelings of respect and reverence; consider hallowed or exalted or be in awe of; "Fear God as your father"; "We venerate genius"
•A feeling of profound respect for someone or something; "the fear of God"; "the Chinese reverence for the dead"; "the French treat food with gentle reverence"; "his respect for the law bordered on veneration"
•Fear is an emotional response to a perceived threat. It is a basic survival mechanism occurring in response to a specific stimulus, such as pain or the threat of danger.

Biologically speaking, when a person experiences fear, certain areas in their brain such as the amygdala and the hypothalamus are immediately activated and appear to control the first physical response to fear. Chemicals such as adrenaline and the stress hormone cortisol are released into the blood stream causing certain physical reactions such as:
Rapid heart rate
Increased blood pressure
Tightening of muscles
Sharpened or redirected senses
Dilation of the pupils (to let in more light)
Increased sweating

People who have experienced this will often remember the moment when disaster stuck and how time seemed to slow down. They knew exactly what to do without consciously thinking about it, they had great strength (some have even been able to lift a car to save their trapped child) and they felt no pain. All these are protective mechanisms to increase our chances of survival.
There are numerous causes of fear. Some are better known than others such as fear of flying or Aviophobia, fear of spyders-Arachnephobia, and fear of confined spaces-Claustrophobia. Others types of fear not so well known are fear of mirrors-Catoptrophobia, and fear of hair-Chaetophobia. Fear of being tickled by feathers-Pteronophobia, and Papyrophobia or fear of paper are yet other not so well known causes of fear.

Root of Fear
We have many fears-fear of terrorism, fear of death, fear of being separated from people we love, fear of losing control, fear of commitment, fear of failure, fear of rejection, fear of losing our job, the list is never-ending! Many of our present fears are rooted in what Buddha identified as “delusions” – distorted ways of looking at OURSELVES and the world around us. If we learn to control our mind, and reduce and eventually eliminate these delusions, the source of all our fear, healthy and unhealthy, is eradicated.

What Causes Fear
Our brain consists of clusters of nerves that make it as a profound organ. The nerve cells in it, sends sensory signals to every part that is essentially connected to it. It can be a signal that makes us consciously aware of things around us or a signal that can be present only when stimulated. One of them is fear; fear is aroused by different stimuli. It varies in form and condition. Fear is felt when certain factors give us a feeling of being threatened or being afraid on something that might possibly happen.

There are classifications of fear and what causes fear itself. Inside us, our brain is developed to identify what causes and signifies fear in us. There are a lot of sources where we get our fears. It can be develop within our social environment, in our subconscious mind, and in the clause of our norms and values, or even during drastic changes.

In the concept of fear, there are different variations of this response, which is according to its degrees. It can be just a mild cautionary fear, phobia or trauma, or paranoia. Certain emotional relations with anxiety, pain, worry, fright, panic and terror relatively emits fear.
Today, there is several fear factors that trigger these emotional responses, one of them is highly mentioned and voted for recently. It's the fear with terrorist's attacks, death, failure, war, heights, crime, violence, and some selected animals or insects like spiders or cockroaches. But in reality, we all get that feeling of fearing something once in our life and the best thing to do is to overcome what causes fears so we can live according to what we want and not because fear is hindering us.

Symptoms of Fear
Symptoms of fear may come and go, may be persistent, or may appear frequently. The underlying component is fear is the feeling when one is not able to think logically and rationally.

Physical Symptoms of fear are:-
Tightness in chest
Tightness in throat
Oversensitivity to noise
Depersonalization
Breathlessness
Weakness in muscles
Lack of energy
Hollowness in stomach
Sighing

The Behavioral symptoms of fear are:-
Sleep disturbances
Appetite disturbances
Absentmindedness
Social withdrawal
Dreams of deceased
Avoidance of reminders
Searching/Calling out
Restless over activity
Crying
Clinging to reminders
Treasuring objects

Types of Fear
Our fear comes in different ways, some of the well known fears, which we experience commonly are as follows: -
Abandonment
Being bad, corrupt, evil, defective
Being controlled by others
Being deprived
Being harmed
Being incapable
Being of no value, worthless
Being unloved
Being useless
Change
Conflict
Death
Defeat
Diminishment, decline
Disease
Doing wrong
Failure
Fragmentation
Hurting others
Ignorance
Incompetence
Incorrect decisions
Injury
Insecurity
Invasion of boundaries
Isolation
Lack
Limitation
Loneliness
Looking stupid
Loss
Loss of connection
Material loss
Meaninglessness
No identity
Pain
People
Personal insignificance
Possessiveness
Poverty
Public speaking
Rejection
Relationships
Responsibility
Self-exposure
Self-expression
Selfishness
Separation
Sexuality
Shyness
Success
Support, guidance
Truth, God, duty, being oneself
Unknown
Vulnerability

Help for Fear
Seeking fear help is necessary so that you do not have to face the consequences that these fears bring along. Unless fear help is sought, these fears can consume us to such an extent that we become immobilized due to them. Fear causes confusion, inactivity and failure and can even result in physical ailments.

There are a number of natural herbal and homeopathic remedies that can help with overcoming fears. Fear becomes a problem that needs to be addressed when it turns into anxiety, panic or phobias. Herbs such as Melissa Officinalis, Lavandula Augustifolia, Chamomile and Passiflora Incarnata are just a few examples of a natural approach to overcoming fears by reducing stress, calming the nervous system and relaxing a fearful mind.

Many natural remedies for fear and anxiety combine a number of calming herbs to achieve the best results for overcoming fears and addressing all the different symptoms of a panicked response..
Fear help can also be sought by reaching out to others. On the other hand you can also provide yourself some fear help by self-help activities. Below are some things that you can do to ensure that you do something about your fear and seek fear help.

•Accept the fear as part of who you are – Don’t rationalize your actions or avoid fearful situations. The more you tell yourself that you are not afraid of certain things that you are afraid of, the more your fear is likely to get deep set. Ignoring an issue is not likely to solve it. On the other hand accepting that you are afraid of a certain thing allows you the freedom to attack it more openly and with more gusto.
•Analyze it – Acceptance does not mean that you stop to seek fear help and just let things be. Once you have accepted the specific fear that you have and have identified it, make sure that you analyze why you have that specific fear. The fear may be emanating from some incident that happened in the past or some stories that you may have heard. This may require some introspection and deep thinking but if you have decided that you are going to overcome thins fear, you will have to continue to explore inside yourself the real reason for the fear. If you are unable to do so, seek fear help by consulting with a counselor.

•Controlled exposure – Once you have analyzed the real cause of your fear, don’t avoid the situation completely. Fear help with come to you in different ways. Start exposing yourself to small doses of the stimulus that makes you panic. For instance if you are afraid of heights, then start to look down from the stairs on the first floor. Make sure that you prepare yourself for it before you do so. If you feel comfortable about being on the first floor and looking down, take the next challenge and go to a taller building and try the same. If you get dizziness and nausea during such instances, make sure to be safe and take a friend along.

•Talk to others – Sometimes talking to people who have sought fear help and then overcome the challenge can help you feel more confident that you can do the same. Speak to people who have been afraid of certain things and conquered the feeling of extreme anxiety and panic. If you are unable to find such people, enroll in a fear help group where people talk about their fears to deal with it.

Quotes
Trust in your faith, believe in yourself and your fears will starve to death. – Oluwabamidele

Fear is the main source of superstition, and one of the main sources of cruelty. To conquer fear is the beginning of wisdom – Bertrand Russell

If we let things terrify us, life will not be worth living – Seneca

The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear – Nelson Mandela
The only thing we have to fear is fear itself--nameless, unreasoning, unjustified terror which paralyzes needed efforts to convert retreat into advance. – Franklin Delano

The way you overcome shyness is to become so wrapped up in something that you forget to be afraid. ~Lady Bird Johnson

It is not power that corrupts but fear. Fear of losing power corrupts those who wield it and fear of the scourge of power corrupts those who are subject to it. – Aung Sab Suu Kyi
No passion so effectually robs the mind of all its powers of acting and reasoning as fear. – Edmund Burke

The cave you fear to enter holds the treasure you seek. – Joseph Campbell

I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.- Frank Herbert

I have accepted fear as a part of life - specifically the fear of change.... I have gone ahead despite the pounding in the heart that says: turn back. ~Erica Jong

Creating Empowering Beliefs

What is Beliefs? This is a mental acceptance of and conviction in the truth, actuality, or validity of something. Since we have looked at the meaning of beliefs, the next question is to ask ourselves, what kinds of belief are truly empowering? Which ones will help us to reach our goals and succeed in improving the quality of our life?

The answer is simple, beliefs that will empower us to make positive changes, beliefs that can catapult us to the next level of our life, be it career, relationships, family etc. This would include beliefs that allow us to change how we feel about things, and those that allow us to change our own behavior.

One of the keys to your success is your ability to change your belief system. Your beliefs create your reality - change your beliefs and you change your life.

Feelings and behavior define who we are as a person. Most of the time our behavior is just the outward manifestation of our feelings, and our feelings are a reflection of how we view things through the window of our beliefs.

For instants, is the lady beautiful? Was that person trying to insult me or are they just running low on resources? Is this challenge a bummer or an opportunity? The answers really depend upon our beliefs and how we choose to sort information and view circumstances.

Below are some guidelines to creating empowering beliefs

The sky is large enough to accommodate everyone: -
There is an endless supply of everything you desire when you connect with your spiritual source. You came from nothing, out of a surge and impulse for life. The universe provided everything you ever needed to grow in life. Everything in this world is created in the same way - from a desire to exist. Express your full desires in grateful appreciation of the world around you and watch them grow like flowers emerging from the ground in springtime.

Your thought determines who you are: -
Change your negative thoughts into positive ones. While positive thinking alone will not alter your existing beliefs, it is a practice that can help you get in line with your thought patterns in a more conscious way.

Rather than being a victim of your own thoughts, you can take control of them and choose them moment-to-moment. As you become aware of negative thoughts throughout the day, consciously replace them with equally positive (and usually opposite) thoughts.

For example, if you find yourself thinking that you’ll never be successful because you just can’t seem to break out of your limiting behaviors, consciously affirm that you have just as much potential to be successful as anyone else.

Visualize yourself with the determination, courage, and optimism you’ll need to succeed. And the next time negative thoughts arise in your mind, go through the same process again.

Remember that it is a process and it will take time to get into the habit of thinking positively, but it does begin to have an effect on how you feel on a regular basis. And the better you feel, the more positively you’ll think. You end up creating a continuous cycle of positive thoughts, positive feelings, positive beliefs, and positive actions!

Belief in yourself:-
Develop a stronger belief in yourself. While you’re working on transforming the quality of your thoughts, you can also purposely develop a strong belief in yourself and your abilities. A good way to start is by making a list of your positive character traits, qualities, skills, and talents. Write down every positive thing you can come up with about yourself, even if you don’t think it’s that amazing.

Then simply spend some time every day reading this list and affirming your ability to accomplish whatever you set your mind to. Over time, you’ll begin to feel more positive about yourself and more confident about your abilities, just because you’ve developed the habit to do so.

Motivation: -
Empower and motivate yourself. Another wonderful tool for forming new beliefs is using your imagination to change your self-image. Visualization is an easy yet effective tool to replace your old, limiting self-image with an empowering new one. You simply close your eyes and conjure a mental image of yourself as you want to be.

You are the writer of your book: -
It’s your life and whatever you make out of it depends on what you put into it, as they always say “ as you lay your bed so will you lay on it” you own yourself the full responsibility for your actions in life, Blaming anyone else for the results in your life does nothing to change your circumstances. Instead, focus on what you can think, feel, and do to sail where you want.

Create a spirit of forgiveness: -
Forgiveness goes a very long way in our individual lives, God himself takes delights in the act of forgiveness, so when you have hurt, or have been hurt by someone else, then you must forgive. Forgiveness does not mean to condone the behaviour, but rather serves to release the hurt and promote healing. Without forgiveness, the hurt festers and infects, leading to disease and further pain. To forgive, first ask, "What can I learn from this?" Then express gratitude for allowing the gift of learning in to your life. Try as much as possible to forgive every wrong doing towards you and release yourself to the word of God.

Why not take a moment to write down some of the beliefs you have about reality. What do you believe to be true about yourself; could it be your health, career, relationships, finances, spirituality, etc? You own yourself the responsibility to be who you really wants to be, so don’t let any negative beliefs limits you.

Good luck and stay bless.


Cheers


Quotes

"Don't let the negativity given to you by the world disempowered you. Instead give to yourself
that which empowers you."
- Les Brown

"All personal breakthroughs being with a change in beliefs. So how do we change? The most effective way is to get your brain to associate massive pain to the old belief. You must feel deep in your gut that not only has this belief cost you pain in the past, but it's costing you in the present and, ultimately, can only bring you pain in the future. Then you must associate tremendous pleasure to the idea of adopting a new, empowering belief."
- Tony Robbins

It's the repetition of affirmations that leads to belief. And once that belief becomes a deep conviction, things begin to happen.
- Bristol, Claude M.

You can change your beliefs so they empower your dreams and desires. Create a strong belief in yourself and what you want.
- Wieder, Marcia

"You can change your beliefs so they empower your dreams and desires. Create a strong belief in yourself and what you want."
- Marcia Wieder

We are as great as our belief in human liberty -- no greater. And our belief in human liberty is only ours when it is larger than ourselves.
- Macleish, Archibald

If you don't have solid beliefs you cannot build a stable life. Beliefs are like the foundation of a building, and they are the foundation to build your life upon.
- Montapert, Alfred A.

Creating a Positive Impact

When you start making positive impacts you begin to attract positive situations, positive people, and positive opportunities. People will starts to connect with you from different angle. It's like a thousand hands show up to help you, making your life better and more rewarding on a daily basis.

It has been said times without numbers that first impressions matter. Indeed, the academics and psychologists who study this kind of stuff, say that people take about a half a second to make up their minds on either to meet someone or not. You may call it a quick judgement, well I believe it's more about the impact you make, and whether it's the one you want to make.
Making an immediate positive impression on others is essential for success both individually and in Business. How you come across has a big impact on how well you do in life and in business. You cannot ignore the fact that people are more likely to want to connect with or do business with those who are self-aware, comfortable in their own skin and confident with who they are.

You don't have to wait for avenue to make a big impact, make a small impact and build from there; you don't have to give somebody money, or gold especially if you can't afford it, give your time, your understanding, your knowledge this will go a very long way.

Ways on how you can create a positive impact

Learn to praise people: -
With my experience in different industries over the years, I have got to understand that there is power behind praise; do not underestimate the power of praise.
Praise is a strong motivational factor for a number of reasons. People like to feel that their hard work is not only being noticed, but appreciated as well. Knowing that they are doing their jobs well is better motivation to keep up the good work. So take the time to make a positive impact on your employees daily by praising them for the work they do, for their team spirit, good attitude, or anything else that helps contribute to the office. Praise in public as well as private. Set the example.
The example you set in the office will have a ripple effect on your employees whether positive or negative. You can make a positive impact daily by remaining in a good mood and keeping a positive, optimistic outlook at all times. Don't blame others or complain about things you don't have any control over, and don't be vocal about your gripes or annoyances. This kind of attitude and example will spread to your employees and soon create a negative atmosphere in the office.

Say out loudly what you have in mind
Most people have the fears of speaking their thoughts out, some could be as a result of been shy, Speaking out loud prevent us from trying, much less, doing what we've wanted to do. Sometimes, all it takes to initiate a positive social change is to voice out our opinions.
If you feel you have something to say to friends, families or maybe the people in your office then go ahead and do so why wait; with increase in technology, social networking sites has made communication easy and convenient. You can write what you want to say in your blog or social networking site, eg; Facebook, Twitters or in any other online medium. You can also write an article and submit it to your local paper.
If you're worried about your writing skills, don't be. In the end, it's the content that ultimately matters. If you write with all your heart then it's sure to come out good. But then again, you can also ask help from loved ones and have them critique your work before you start sharing them with others.

Develop a good rapport with people around you: -
This can be achieved by have a good communication with people around you. Relates with them freely see everyone as important as you see yourself. In the office place, recognize your staffs as part of the business, let them know they are as important as yourself and their full commitment will be highly appreciated. Give them the chance to walk into your office to discuss issues both business wise and personal life with you, have a listening ear. Do not rely on emails and phone calls alone when dealing with your customers and your staffs, try as much as possible to initiate face to face communication; this goes a long way and it as more positive impact.

Giving a helping hand:
You don’t need to make it BIG before you can help someone in need. A little help can save a life, give your time, share your knowledge, learn to see other needs as important as your own needs. For instants, give somebody a hand with their shopping bags at the mall, open a door for somebody who has their hands full, Listen to your son/daughter the next time they talk to you, all these look so simple but it goes a very long way in the heart of whoever you are helping at that point.

Lastly; next time you run into an old friend or come across somebody who may need a helping hand, take the time to have a positive impact, give from your heart, knowing you will be saving somebody else and creating positive situations in your life.
These are just a few of many ways you create a daily positive impact throughout your office and with your employees. Continuing to do so will make your office a better, more productive place to work for all employees.

There is no better time than now, start making a positive impact today. Be the person who makes a difference in people's lives.

All the best!!!!!

Quotes for the Day

Instead of counting your days, while not make your days count- Oluwabamidele

If you think you are too small to be effective, you have never been in bed with a mosquito. ~Betty Reese

My piece of bread only belongs to me when I know that everyone else has a share, and that no one starves while I eat. ~Leo Tolstoy

Find out how much God has given you and from it take what you need; the remainder is needed by others. ~Saint Augustine

If you have time to whine and complain about something then you have the time to do something about it. ~Anthony J. D'Angelo,

Way To Set And Achieve Your Goals

Change can be very uneasy sometimes, but without change there can be no progress and at the same time, without progress, life itself can get boring, dull or you find that you're just not enjoying the process anymore.
It’s been said that everyone has goals, whether we know it or not. We have goals to keep us going in life. E.g.; be our current job, or to get a different one. We have goals to save for the future, or to travel, take a vacation, or purchase the things we need and want to make our lives more enjoyable. Many great people believe it is very important to be focused on their goals while the rest of us do not see it as important at all. Henry Ford said and I quote, “Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off your goal”.
“Though no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending”. So there is no better time to set your goals than now.
Goal setting and goal achievement are much easier if certain steps are followed.

Steps in Achieving Your Goals
•Desire: - As Napoleon Hill said in one of his book; "The starting point of all achievement is desire. Keep this constantly in mind. Weak desires bring weak results, just as a small amount of fire makes a small amount of heat." With this in mind it shows your very first step in goal setting and achieving your dreams is that you've got to really, really want to achieve the goal. Believe in yourself that you can achieve the goal in question.

•Specific Goal: - great men know to achieve their goals, they must know exactly what they want, or what they are trying to achieved. George Lucas once said; and I quote “Part of the issue of achievement is to be able to set realistic goals, but that's one of the hardest things to do because you don't always know exactly where you're going, and you shouldn't”. In other words, your goal much be defined. Be specific in your goal; never use words like some, or a little bit when setting your goals. You can achieve almost everything if only you brain can have a clear picture of what the goals are. Sidney Howard once said and I quote; One half of knowing what you want is knowing what you must give up before you get it.

•Have a Plan: - “A goal without a plan is just a wish.” for the path you need to follow to accomplish the goal. Create action steps to follow. Identify a critical path. The critical path defines the key accomplish-ments along the way, the most important steps that must happen for the goal to become a reality. Stephen Covey said, "All things are created twice. There's a mental or first creation, and a physical or second creation of all things. You have to make sure that the blueprint, the first creation, is really what you want, that you've thought everything through. Then you put it into bricks and mortar.
If you don't know where you are going, you will probably end up somewhere else, said by Lawrence J. Peter

•Write Down Your Goal: - Quoting Lee Iacocca, "The discipline of writing something down is the first step toward making it happen." This is perfectly right, always write
down your plan, the action steps and the critical path. Somehow, writing down the goal, the plan and a timeline sets events in motion that may not have happened otherwise.
For me what I do is to write a short description of my goals every single morning, as a personal reminder of my priorities and my objectives. The act of writing your goals down vastly increases your chance of success. Write it down! Then, keep your notes where you can see and read them every day.

•Measure your Goal: - A goal without a measurable outcome is just a pin in the sea. A time frame should be assigned to any given goals. Like the saying goes: Rome was not built in a day and at the same time It does take eternity to built it.“What gets measured gets done.” Define your goals in terms of height, weight, dollars, inches, or hours. Then measure your progress until you achieve your desired outcome.

•Make you goal to be consistent with your Values: - some of the many reasons people fail in achieving their goals is that they have conflict between their behaviour and their values in life. When you values and your goals are in agreement, there is not limit or barrier in achieving your goals. It is advisable to have a good certification about your values first, and then set your specific, measurable goals that are consistent with your values. If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.

•Review your progress over and over again: - review your process regularly, and make sure you are making progress. There are no shortcuts to any place worth going. If you are not making progress, try to figure out what has gone wrong, or better still hire a coach, read books pertaining to the goal in question, analyze why the goal is not being met. Don’t allow the goal to just fade away. Figure out what you need to do to accomplish it. Go over the process again.
This above listed steps to setting and achieving your goal could look simple, but it is the most powerful system you will ever need for achieving your goals. Cheers. See you next time.

Quotes on Goals
This is a story about four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody. There was an important job to be done and Everybody was sure that Somebody would do it. Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did it. Somebody got angry about that, because it was Everybody's job. Everybody thought Anybody could do it, but Nobody realized that Everybody wouldn't do it. It ended up that Everybody blamed Somebody when Nobody did what Anyone could have. Don’t leave what you can do believing someone else will do it for you

None of our men are "experts." We have most unfortunately found it necessary to get rid of a man as soon as he thinks himself an expert because no one ever considers himself expert if he really knows his job. A man who knows a job sees so much more to be done than he has done, that he is always pressing forward and never gives up an instant of thought to how good and how efficient he is. Thinking always ahead, thinking always of trying to do more, brings a state of mind in which nothing is impossible. The moment one gets into the "expert" state of mind a great number of things become impossible. -Henry Ford, Sr.

When people say to me: "How do you do so many things?" I often answer them, without meaning to be cruel: "How do you do so little?" It seems to me that people have vast potential. Most people can do extraordinary things if they have the confidence or take the risks. Yet most people don't. They sit in front of the television and treat life as if it goes on forever. -Philip Adams

You must have long-range goals to keep you from being frustrated by short-range failures. -Charles C. Noble

I tell you that as long as I can conceive something better than myself I cannot be easy unless I am striving to bring it into existence or clearing the way for it. -George Bernard Shaw

Building a wonderful life for yourself

1. Positive Attitude

Like the saying goes, positive thinking develop positive attitude, Your attitude to your life can have a massive impact on you. For instants if you decided to chose two days out of a week. On the first day, you lived life from a positive prospective. You smiled and laughed through the day, no matter what the world has in store for you and you looked for the positive in everything. I assured you by the end of the day, you would have enjoyed a wonderful day. And also you would have had a massive impact on your environment and the people you came into contact with.

Now, what would happen if on the second day you chose to be negative? Imagine what it would be like. You can’t see the good in anything. The world is not a nice place to live. You see everyone around you as been a problem to you. It is believe that one can choose his or her attitude every minute of the day. This is fantastic; right at least you have a say in whatever way you want to live your life.
Base on this, I can’t really see why you would want to choose a negative attitude, as it does not benefit you or the people around you. Therefore it makes sense to choose a positive one. Believe me you will have more fun, be more popular and see life has the best place to live.

If you are unsure how to start out positively, then keep your focus at the start on people. Really see them as fellow human beings who are doing their best to live their lives. Imagine how a smile, a warm greeting and an unexpected compliment could make their day

2. Educate yourself

Education is considered one of the best gifts one can ever give to him/herself. Our brain is magnificent. It can do so many things. So why not pay more attention to how you treat it and look after it. Look at feeding and nourishing your brain with useful material, read books and materials that will give positive impact to your life, Choose the material that you look to fill your brain with carefully.
As the days goes bye; look at the information you choose to think about and to focus on as tools to help you on your journey. Some items may cheer you up, make you laugh and smile. Other items may help you overcome obstacles and get you out of ruts. Some items will help you soar like an eagle. There are so many books written by professionals from various times, if you are the type that find it difficult in reading, try as much as possible to put sometime aside each week to read, even if it is an article, a comment or a book. You could also look at getting some of the books on cassette or CD so you can play them in the car, download them into your MP3 players or when you are relaxing at home.

The important part is keeping an open mind and searching for fresh ideas and perspectives.
Education builds over time. It might feel like the bits of wisdom you acquire don’t mean much, but over the years they add up to form a wiser, kinder, more interesting person.

3. Build your friendship network

Friendships are considered very crucial in our lives, the friends you choose might ether make you or destroy you. It’s great having friends. They are an intricate part of our lives. We have a need to share ourselves with someone who cares to listen to us.
There are the true close friends who will always support us. Sometimes when we do stupid things or make silly mistakes. They are there to encourage us to get up off the floor and dust ourselves down and keep going.

The great thing is that they look at us and see all the good things that we can be when we are at our best and at the same time they are normally very good at forgiving us when we fall short of what we could be.

The so many social networking sites around now, it is easy to have access to thousands of friends by the click of your mouse, but at the same time, one should be very careful in choosing who and who to add as friends, for me when I meet someone new, I try as much as possible to find something that interests me about my new friend, this could comes in different forms, maybe the way, they speaks, their thinking skills e.t.c. while choosing your friends don’t forget your families also, contact them as possible as you can, appreciates them by telling them, how wonderful they are. Taking the time to cultivate and enjoy personal relationships is essential to long-term happiness. Without the people you care about you’ll probably be miserable, no matter how successful you become.

4. Goals

This is considered a very important step in life, writing down your goals and then reviewing them on a regular basis can make a major difference to your life. The review of your written goals is very important, as you need to keep yourself focused on what you want to achieve and it also helps to have some way of measuring whether you are making progress. Look at your life now. Are you drifting along, living each day but with no real target about where you want to go?
Goals should be in different stages, short term goals, long term goals, mostly as human, we are more focused on where we are going for vacation on our next holiday or the best designer clothes we wants to buy for the coming New year, rather thinking of what can be done to make impact in our lives. Time is ticking away. You can’t buy time; all you can do is look at how you spend it. With a goal written down, you are telling your brain that there’s something that you want to accomplish.

Get a piece of paper now and write down 5 goals you’d like to achieve (remember to shoot for the stars on one of them). Then have some fun with each goal. Imagine backwards from achieving the goal how you got there.
For example, if it was a new car you wanted, the step before you bought it may be selecting where you were going to buy it, the brand you come across with before you finally choose what you buy.

You should end up with a set of events leading back from achieving your target (it’s normally easier to work back from a goal, than it is to work forward to it when you want to look at what steps are involved in achieving your goal). Have a think about who might be able to support you achieving this goal. This could be your parents, family member, best friends, partners e.t.c. choose someone who is positive (after all you want someone who’s going to cheer you on, not pour cold water over everything). It’s easier to have a team of supporters cheering you on than it is to try and take on the whole thing yourself.

Look at your goal events list and pick one action that will move you nearer to your goal and go and do it (may be worth starting off with some of the easier ones, as they normally take less time and they can help in building your confidence.


Here are some meaningful Life Quotes, as you mediate on them, hopefully you have reasons to build on your daily life.

When I hear somebody sigh, "Life is hard," I am always tempted to ask, "Compared to what?"
- Sydney J. Harris

Your life feels different on you, once you greet death and understand your heart's position. You wear your life like a garment from the mission bundle sale ever after -- lightly because you realize you never paid nothing for it, cherishing because you know you won't ever come by such a bargain again.
- Louise Erdrich

It's only when we truly know and understand that we have a limited time on earth -- and that we have no way of knowing when our time is up -- that we will begin to live each day to the fullest, as if it was the only one we had.
- Elisabeth Kubler-Ross
Without some goal and some effort to reach it, no one can live.
- Fyodor Dostoyevsky

I am on the side of the unregenerate who affirm the worth of life as an end in itself, as against the saints who deny it.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes

There is no short cut to achievement. Life requires thorough preparation -- veneer isn't worth anything.
- George Washington Carver

You desire to know the art of living, my friend? It is contained in one phrase: make use of suffering.
- Henri-Frederic Amiel

TRICKS OF THE MIND

The mind is man’s most wonderful tool. It seems to operate within a different set of rules than what ordinary reason will suggest. See if you can read the next paragraph.

if yuo can raed tihs, you hvae a sgtrane mnid, too. Can you raed tihs? Olny 55 plepoe out of 100 can. i cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt!

The research proves a very important point, even though very subtly: the mind sees what it wants to see. That is why when you proofread a document you just wrote you hardly see the errors, because you are reading what you have in mind, not what you wrote. Get someone else to review it, and you are baffled at the number of common errors that are revealed. It’s a trick of the mind. Your ability to read the Cambridge research above is dependent on your experience (what your mind has been conditioned to believe.)



For centuries, people believed that Aristotle was right when he said that the heavier an object, the faster it would fall to earth. Aristotle was regarded as the greatest thinker of all time, and surely he would not be wrong. Anyone, of course, could have taken two objects, one heavy and one light, and dropped them from a great height to see which object would land first. But no one did until nearly 2,000 years after Aristotle's death. Legend has it that in 1589, Galileo summoned learned professors to the base of the Leaning Tower of Pisa. Then he went to the top and pushed off a ten-pound and a one-pound weight. Both landed at the same instant. The mind’s perception was so strong, however, that the professors denied their eye’s witness. They continued to insist Aristotle was right.

Old traditions hardly die. It appears we are all incapable of living without bias. We don’t see things as they are; we see things as we want to see them or as we are conditioned to see them. As Covey states in The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, we see things the way we are. That is perception. The good news is that perception is learnt, meaning that it can be unlearnt as well. What perception do your customers have? Do you need to reinforce it or dismantle it?

No matter what the Cambridge research says, convention still demands that you get your spellings right. Otherwise, the rest of us will consider you ‘stgrane’ and ‘unprfossieanol’.